Smarty

Sometimes I think that I don't give Leo enough credit. It's not that I think he's dumb, I just, well I think that sometimes I set the bar low, so I won't be disappointed. Also, I don't know quite what to expect of him. I like to think that he's high functioning, and all signs so far seem to point towards this, but I don't want to get too comfortable. Will he keep going at this trajectory? Will he have some huge plateau and just stop developing at age five? Maybe that sounds silly, but I just don't know. Maybe it's a protective measure--if I expect little or nothing, then whatever I get is gravy. For years I've been reading about how parents of children with Down syndrome celebrate the little victories, the tiny accomplishments. It's really true. So I've just come to expect little things. And of course, to celebrate them.

Well, he is just full of surprises. And never ceases to amaze me, really.

Two recent things:

1) Leo is very interested in opening packages (making it impossible to put any presents under the tree this year but that's another story). Last week a box arrived for me. It was a small box containing shoes that I was not sure I was going to keep so I didn't want to bother to opening them. Well Leo had other plans. We've received a few gifts via the mail recently so I'm sure he thought it contained something for him. I told him that No we weren't going to open the box right now, and proceeded to begin my evening coming home ritual of hanging up coats, unpacking lunch boxes, going through kids' papers, starting dinner. It was after a few minutes that I realized Leo was being suspiciously quiet. There were no pleas for "Dora" (which is usually the first thing he asks for when I pick him up from school.

That's when I spotted him. He had gone into the junk drawer to retrieve a pair of scissors, which he had seen me use (bad modeling) last week to open a package. Before you call Children's Services on me I keep those scissors way in the back of the drawer but yes, it is troubling that he reached them (note to self, move scissors). There was Leo, sitting on the mud room floor, attempting to open my shoe box with the scissors. He had thought through the opening process and realized he would need a tool, knew where said tool was, and got it. His attempts were quickly dashed by me, but I still thought the whole thing was pretty great.

2) During the weekend's playing in the snow fun, Leo wanted me to pull him in the Red Flyer wagon. There was way too much snow for wagon pulling, so I explained to him that it would not be possible to pull the wagon because it would get stuck in the snow. That's when he climbed out of the wagon, bent down and began digging the snow out from under the wheels of the wagon. Again, he thought through the problem and thought up a solution (that's him, pictured above, trying to dig the snow out from under the wagon tires).

Leo, you are quite a guy.

Bright

OK, I've had some coffee. I'm in a better mood.

It's snowing again. I love how the house looks so bright, with all the blinds up and the white of the snow outside reflecting inside. It's so pretty. Not to mention how pretty snow looks falling. So very relaxing. Especially when you don't have to go anywhere.

Awake

So Leo was up at 5:41 this morning. Sunday. I got to sleep in yesterday so I shouldn't be complaining, I'm just frustrated. It makes for a l-o-ng day. The nice thing is, he is playing quietly in our basment playroom (I'm sure he's quietly destorying it too, but no matter) allowing me to putter around upstairs in the quiet house, drink coffee, be productive (Facebook, blog).

In the end we got a bit of snow, probably close to a foot out there with the combination of storms. I'm wondering if school will be open tomorrow. I have a short week (just working Monday and Tuesday) so it would be good if I could go in.

We had a fun day yesterday, making the best of the slight snow boundness. We played outside in the morning (Ellie is slowly making it clear that she apppears to not be an outdoors person). She did not like the snow. Leo of course loved it. I took a few cute movies and some nice pictures that I'll post Monday.

The highlight of the day was making the gingerbread house. I will say yet again how I think we have the only four-year-old boy in captivity who doesn't like candy. He didn't try to eat any of the decorations. Not one! That's weird, right? Ellie napped through it but when she came downstairs she squeeled and clapped when she saw the finished product. I mean she was really excited. It was funny.

OK I just heard a door slam ominously downstairs (Leo). I better check on him.

Update #2

OK, it's finally snowing.

Come on weather. Bring it.

TV is turned off. Kids playing nicely. I am working. No, really.

I had thought about going to Target. We don't really need anything but I thought it would be good to get out while we had the chance. But now I'm not so sure.

What I really want is coffee.

Stuck in house with two trays of Lard Bars. Not good.

Update

Still no snow.

Lard bars: Done!

Minutes of Sesame Street watched by Leo: Too many.

Snow Day With No Snow (Yet)

I got the call before 6 a.m. today. The district has closed the schools, even though there is no snow yet. Not one flake. Apparently they are predicting 6-12 inches, to start later this morning.

See, my west coast readers (my family in Oregon has been virtually housebound, the city of Portland paralyzed, gripped in the clutches of two inches of snow), even the east coast freaks about the weather!

Hearing about the weather forecast yesterday afternoon, I arranged to work from home today, thinking I would at least have the morning (if there was an early dismissal) to get my work done without hooligans around. And I also thought I could get a bit of baking in between the paragraphs and phone calls.

But, crap! Oh well.

It will be fun to watch the storm brew.

The only problem thus far: No Coffee in the House. How did I let this happen?

I think we'll walk to Dunkin after breakfast. It's the only way I see possibly getting through this morning.

Leo's School Holiday (Actually Blatantly Christmas) Party

Before the party. I had to document the outfits. Doesn't Leo look so dapper in his new cordoroy blazer? He's considering a part-time job as an English professor.

And of course I had to share this ridiculously adorable Ellie outfit, courtesy of Grandma Jerry and Aunt Marilyn. Note the fur collar.

Green sprinkles = Green mouth

Ellie really liked this truck. I might have to get her one.

I think it's safe to say that Leo "gets" Christmas this year. He is totally into unwrapping presents.


The school was very generous. Each child (student) and sibling/s were called to Santa and presented with a gift. Ellie got a stuffed bear and Leo a game that looks to have many, many pieces. Sigh.

Wouldn't be complete without a terrible picture of all of us. Ellie was not feeling Santa at all and refused to even get into a seated position on his lap. But, Leo looks great. A virtual pose-with-Santa expert.

Photo Thursday

I think this picture says it all.

Look at Leo's face. He is MAD.

But then, he went to give her a kiss. This definitely sums up the relationship right now. It's very love/hate. This was taken during one of my many holiday card attempts.

Tuesday Thoughts

-I woke up to the sound of pouring rain this morning, and of course it was dark. A perfect recipe for wanting to absolutely bolt out of bed with excitement to start the day! I can’t tell you how much I wanted to stay home, pull the covers over my head and go back to sleep. Let the kids wake up naturally (knowing full well it would be three minutes later, but no matter). Then I would spend the day baking some of the estimated seven million baked goods that I need to make in the next week—we are scaling back and doing cookies as gifts to teachers, therapists, co-workers and colleagues this year. In case you are curious I am making:

-Oatmeal Chocolate Chip cookies
-Mexican Wedding Cookies
-Lard Bars (Graham cracker crust, condensed milk, coconut, chocolate chips, walnuts they don’t call them Lard Bars for nothing).
-Lemon Squares

-I’m having holiday card anxiety. Last year at this time I’m pretty sure the cards were not only ordered but also addressed, mailed and received (complete, even, with holiday themed stamps, that’s how much time I had on my hands last year). And of course, the cards were perfect (if I do say so). This year, well, No. A total of four adorable holiday outfits sit in Ellie’s closet. Leo has a new suit and tie as well as three irresistible holiday sweaters. And every attempt at a holiday card has failed miserably. Maybe this year we’ll go for a New Year’s card? Valentine’s Day? It was so much easier to photograph them when one of them was immobile. It never fails now when one is hamming it up for the camera the other is screaming, most likely crying, and definitely running in the opposite direction. Leo has also taken to actually yelling at me when I try to photograph him. Not sure what's going on there. I am about ready to pack it in and use pictures taken earlier this year, perhaps ones even, gasp, that have been previously published on this very blog. Would it kill anyone? Not to mention, would anyone even notice? That’s what I thought.

-I am feeling very smug because I have discovered I can sneak tofu into my children’s scrambled eggs. I know I'm not the first to do this and I know this is riveting (ha) but this kind of information excites me. I am now wondering what else I can sneak. If only spinach wasn’t so green and obvious.

-I’ve decided I would like to move us all to Pocket Hollow. I don’t know where this is located but I like the sound of it. It’s where Toot & Puddle live. We’ve yet to watch this new show but the ads on Noggin are absolutely irresistible and every time I hear them say the words “Pocket Hollow” I think yes, that’s where I need to live. That’s where I will be happy and carefree.

-In spite of the fact that I have no baking done and no gifts purchased, I am in holiday countdown mode. That is because I have almost two weeks off work coming up wherein we can sleep in (well, not set an alarm clock) stay in our pajamas all day if we want to, I don’t have to pack breakfasts, lunches, or snacks, pick out clothes for anyone (including myself) in a hurried fashion. My family is visiting from Oregon for six days. It’s a wonderful life.

Weekend

This morning was my morning to sleep in.

Leo has a problem with this. I don't know if he misses me, or what.

A little after 8 a.m., he arrived bedside, with his Little Tikes drum (remind me again why I bought that at a garage sale?).

He played me a little song, stood up and proceeded to sneeze scrambled eggs, all over me.

Happy weekend!

It's the Little Things

It is truly silly how happy a little pair of shoes could make me. And they weren’t even for me.

These

arrived yesterday. And I am in love. I think Ellie likes them. I pointed out the little bird to her and she smiled and stood up and stomped around the house. They are her first pair of real shoes that are just for her. Until now she has gotten by on Robeez and an old pair of hiking boots of Leo’s that are so clunky they seemed to make her trip over her own feet. I was starting to feel funny that she didn’t have real (with actual hard soles) shoes.

I guess it's silly, or you could say that it's nice that I'm so easy to please.

Funny

My new favorite quote.

Tina Fey, on having more children, in the January Vanity Fair.

"I feel like the window is closing...Obviously you want the best chance of the baby being healthy, and I think with our life and jobs right as they are at this moment, it doesn't seem possible. It's the year after the baby comes that is like someone hitting you every day in the face with a hammer."

New Red Dress

Ellie's Grandma Jerry sent holiday outfits for the kids over Thanksgiving weekend. She sent Ellie three dresses (ahem! Think it's a subtle hint that I'm supposed to go get the kids' pictures taken?) We only got as far as trying on the one.




We were so busy "oohing" and "ahhing" over how cute she looked in the curiously tarty Christmas dress, that Leo begged to be let in on the action:

I realize these photos might mean an end to his political career, but I couldn't resist.

I know, I know, this is more like it (Grandma Jerry sent this outfit too).

Once we got the annoying clip-on tie to stay put, Leo seemed to enjoy himself.

And even though I was incredibly full from our Thanksgiving meal (eaten shortly before this photo was taken) I couldn't resist attempting a bite out of an irresistable Leo thigh.

Earning Their Keep

I finally came to my senses last weekend and put the hooligans to work. 'Bout time they started helping out around the place.

Here's Leo, a blur as he dashes over to grab the prized broom out of Ellie's hands.



Here's a familiar sight: Leo getting into something and Ellie standing there, just soaking it all in and also, wondering, what the heck is he doing now?


They were both in love with this mini snow shovel. We used this when we lived in Brooklyn (small apartment = mini snow shovel). Not sure why we kept it but it's pretty darn cute.


I think this is the smile that is going to get Ellie out of a lot of hot water in the teenage years.

Couldn't Ask For More Than That

I've written before about Leo's communication book, a little journal that lives in his backpack, that his teacher and therapists write in when something notable happens. Sometimes it's mundane, a request for more pants if Leo had a potty accident. Sometimes it's distressing: "Leo had a bad morning, he threw up after music and then didn't want to participate in circle time."

Mostly, it's positive: "Leo had a great speech session today, he was able to say "Santa" and "Tree" based on visual cues, without prompting."

But yesterday's note from Leo's teacher, that one was a keeper. It brought tears to my eyes (OK, it doesn't take much, but still).

We had been having a "conversation" about how Leo sometimes wakes up from nap crying and upset. His teacher wanted to know how we handle this at home. Well, back in the good old days when Leo actually napped at home, we would usually either leave him alone and let him have his little tantrum which he would usually snap out of, or we'd cheat and let him watch a little Elmo DVD as a distraction. I wrote to the teacher that I realized she probably couldn't do that.

Here's what she wrote back:

"Leo had a very good day as usual. As you know, we never have any behavior problems from Leo at school. It has only been in the last month and a half that we see the crying episode after he wakes up from nap and it's only for a couple of minutes. And even this is not every day. I think that he sometimes forgets that he has to act like this! (smiley face). Otherwise, he is always a pleasure. As you very well know that he is my bright star!"

Sniff.

Her "bright star"? Nope, I couldn't ask for more than that.

Train Show Pics

As I mentioned, we took the kids to the train show at the New York Botanical Garden last weekend.

It wasn't a huge exhibit, but the whole thing was pretty impressive. It was dozens of miniature reproductions of New York City landmarks (the Metropolitan Museum, the New York Public Library, the Guggenheim) all constructed entirely out of natural ingredients (twigs, branches, moss, leaves). And of course, there were tiny trains running throughout.

Here's Leo admiring the trains. Or, as he calls them, "rains, woo, woo!" (As in trains, go choo, choo!). I just love Leo's crooked little ears. You can't see them too well here, unless you enlarge the picture. Go ahead...you know you want to...

This ladybug train whizzed by crazy fast. That building is supposed to be the Metropolitan Museum. Pretty accurate, I thought.

There was lots of curious peering and crouching. Surprisingly enough, no one tried to scale the short walls.

Leo loved this little house. So much so that we couldn't get him out. Erin and I had to tag team at both doors and then pull him out. Yea, good times. Note the miserably cold looking rainy day. Sure that did wonders for Ellie's cold and brewing ear infection. In spite of the weather, it was a lovely day. They didn't allow strollers in the train exhibit and Leo did great. It was pretty crowded and I thought about how a year ago he probably wouldn't have had the attention span or maturity to handle it. But he was totally into it this year and very focused on looking at each and every train. He didn't dash off or anything, so I call that a success.

We Live and Also, I am a Space Cadet

I think I have broken a record in not blogging. I have had dozens of posts started in my head but there's been Thanksgiving and a busy weekend and a sick Ellie. I have wanted to write about finding long lost relatives, taking the kids to the train show at the New York Botanical Garden (thumbs up) and getting the Christmas tree and Hanukkah Bush (the earliest we've ever done it, much levity is needed this year), and decorating the house and about the new bakeware I bought at Costco and all my optimistic plans to branch out and try some new recipes for holiday cookies this year.

I am on day #2 of staying home with a sick Ellie. She wasn't herself this weekend, but considering she is cutting all four molars and both eye teeth, we chalked it up to teething and also maybe a little cold. But I had that sinking feeling Monday morning when I dropped her off at daycare (and the nagging guilt) and sure enough, just as I sat down to enjoy my Mexican lunch at my desk, I got The Call. Come pick her up. I took her straight to the doctor where she was diagnosed with an ear infection. We were sent home with a prescription and I knew I would at least be home Tuesday. Here's where I give a shout out to my neighborhood pharmacy and I give thanks once again that as much as I sometimes miss the Thai takeout, I'm grateful we no longer live in Brooklyn. I'm pretty sure the pharmacy there would not bring my baby's prescription to my car, go back in to run my credit card and then come back out for me to sign the receipt (Ellie was asleep in the car). Long live the suburbs.

This morning, the plan was to take Ellie to daycare and see how she eased into her return while I took Leo to his follow-up ENT appointment (following his ear cleaning/tube exam sedation two weeks ago). I told the daycare I'd check in with them after Leo's appointment and before I headed into the city for work. Again, with the sinking feeling, as Ellie did NOT look happy to be at daycare when I left her. I sort of knew I'd be back to get her shortly.

Leo was ecstatic to leave daycare, and as an added bonus, alone, with me! No Ellie! Poor guy had no idea we were headed somewhere not so fun, probably his most hated doctor of all, the dreaded ear doctor. But for a moment he had a skip in his step and kept saying "yay" just because. He said hi to everyone on the walk from the car to the doctor's office.

Too bad his appointment isn't actually until tomorrow.

And seriously, I even double checked it. I honestly don't know what my problem was/is. In my defense, sleep has been sucking at our house lately. Two nights in a row Leo has woken up in the middle of the night and ended up in our bed. Sleeping with Leo is like sleeping with an epileptic octopus. There is no other way to describe it. I think he absolutely must have Restless Leg Syndrome. And did I mention he insists on sleeping On me? Like practically on top of me. And last night getting Ellie down was the worst since her newborn days, when she would fall asleep and then wake up with a start, the second we set her down in the Pack N Play. Erin (aka the Baby Whisperer) was finally able to get Ellie down after an hour of me rocking and nuzzling her).

After the morning's dress rehersal for the ENT appointment, I took Leo to school (he was NOT happy about the end of just Mommy and Me, collapsing into a puddle in the parking lot). And then I was back to the daycare to retrieve the still sick Ellie.

So. It's almost 2pm and I have just now finally succeeded in getting Ellie down for a nap (she normally naps around 10am). I feel bad missing work and am optimistic about tomorrow. I don't know what to do. This is when I wish we had a retired grandmother close by. Or any relative, for that matter. But that is a post for another day.

In the meantime, I am vascillating between taking advantage of this quiet moment to lay on the couch and watch "Shakespeare in Love" or cooking an actual dinner for later (as opposed to the usual thaw and stir fry Trader Joe's entree that is our nightly fare). I did all the laundry yesterday so there's nothing else to do (well, truthfully I could do a lot but choose not to. This morning I noticed the lower kitchen cabinets are caked with some sort of yogurt/oatmeal substance and there is always the kitchen floor to mop but I fear that I have hit a bit of a housekeeping wall). Leo is still at school so I should really, really just savor the temporary quiet.

In good news, Ellie has learned a new word being home and sick: juice. Also, she has become quite an expert at "No." I know I will tire of it soon but for now, her little cute baby girl voice saying "no" is pretty freaking adorable. Also, she is mastering body parts--her absolute favorite is nose. I can only conjecture that since mine is on the large side she finds it to be the most fascinating facial body part.

Please say it isn't so. She's been asleep not even 30 minutes and I hear crying. Oy.

New York Times Piece

This is an interesting piece from the New York Times. Even more interesting were the responses, mostly from parents but also from siblings of people with Down syndrome. Warning, have your tissues handy. Very moving, sad, bittersweet, and simply sweet. I find myself both desperately curious to hear from siblings of people with Ds but also terrified. I only want to hear the stories of "my brother made me a better person, he is the glue that holds our family together..." I don't want to hear the bad stuff, but I know it's there.

But there's good stuff too. Trust me.

A Walk With One Kid

Last week when Leo was recovering from his ear procedure, he and I went on a walk together. Just the three of us (Leo, the dog and I).





He found this lion costume in the basement where he was playing and insisted on wearing it for most of the day. Yes, it was Ellie's Halloween costume, and also Leo's two years ago. He used to hate wearing hoods. Now he's kind of obsessed with them.



It was so nice taking a walk with just Leo. One kid is so easy! The dog is another story. I don't think she enjoyed the fact that she had on two leashes, one for me, one for Leo (he loves to walk her but alas, cannot be trusted to do it independently, well truthfully, neither can the dog).



He did pretty well. But he still hates holding my hand to cross the street. It was very cold that day and neither one of us was dressed for it. And we walked to far. Almost a half mile, before I realized we should turn around. Leo got tired, at one point sitting down on the sidewalk.


When we got home, we had a snack and warmed up. Still wearing lion suit.

The New Normal

Remember this little girl I used to brag about? How she ate everything? I don’t think I ever wrote the post about how cute it was that she was loving eating everything out of little bowls.


She ate so delicately and with such thought. She brought to mind Albert in one of my all-time favorite children's books, Bread and Jam for Frances:

"He took a bite of sandwich, a bite of pickle, a bite of hard boiled egg and a drink of milk. Then he sprinkled more salt on the egg and went around again. Albert made the sandwich, the pickle, the egg and the milk come out even." (Note to self: Order this book for kids. OK, for myself).

Well, she wasn't sprinkling salt on her egg or anything, but you get the picture. Anyway, it's too bad I didn't write about it because the thought and daintiness with which she ate was really cute. And too bad, because it’s over.

Ellie is in that new stage called Throw Everything On the Floor But First Mix it With Milk on the High Chair Tray. Oy.

I ask you, why do I ever even bother to mop the kitchen floors (truth be told it is barely a monthly occurrence if I’m lucky, but still!)

It seems that she hardly eats anything right now as she is too busy being Jackson Pollack with food. To be fair, she has a few staples: grape tomatoes, dehydrated strawberries (I know, weird), string cheese and her bottle. She’ll graze for a few minutes on the other stuff and then begins the wiping and the sweeping of everything from the high chair tray to the floor or onto the kitchen table. Lovely.

Sometimes I think my children were put on this Earth solely to make me chill the you know what out about the state of my house. I really have been trying to lower my standards. I don’t clean the toys in the living room up every night now. I don’t freak about piles. The one thing I’m a stickler for though is the dishes (I hate a sink full of dirty dishes but truthfully, I can’t go more than two days with out running the dishwasher because I need the little glass bowls and lids and sippy cups and bottles for packing lunches). And laundry. I don’t like to let that get out of hand. I don’t do it every day but I like to at least sort it every couple of days. Having those lovely piles of dark, white and “middle,” lined up neatly in the basement give me a delightfully deceptive delusion of order.

But back to the eating. I know this is typical for 16 months. Leo was a big time food thrower. I think it’s why our poor dog is about 20 pounds overweight. I was secretly hoping we might avoid the throwing with Ellie (as was, I imagine, our dog’s endocrinologist).

In the meantime, I am just not going to mop ever again. I mean, why bother?

Nice (She Said, Sarcastically)

I received a call from the principal at Leo’s school this morning. Evidently he was escorted off the bus by the bus aide (she works for the bus company, not the school), without his shoes and socks on. Did I mention it was 33 degrees this morning in New Jersey?

Leo has this thing about taking off his shoes and socks in the car. It’s mind-numblingly annoying but hey. It’s one of his little quirks. I live with it. There are some mornings when I think I miss my bus because I am fishing around in the back of our van for a missing Stride Rite sneaker. Actually, what he loves to do is throw his shoes. He’s narrowly missed me a few times. And he’s got particularly good aim with the socks.

But back to this morning. Escorted him off the bus barefoot! How hard would it be to put the shoes and socks back on? The principal was irate. She suggested I call his service coordinator (done). She returned my call right away and said she’d ask the principal to submit a report in writing and that she would take it up with the bus company. Of course, paperwork.

I just hate the idea of people not thinking Leo is “worth it.” Not bothering to put his shoes back on. He doesn’t know any better, people. He’s four. He needs help. I mean really.

All Good or Do You Hear What I Hear?

Just wanted to pop in and say we are home. Leo did well. The doctor said he has probably not been hearing ANYTHING out of either ear. There was so much wax in both ears it was as if he was wearing ear plugs. Yeah. He left one tube in and took the other one out that had fallen out. It will be interesting to see how he feels/acts now that he can you know, hear.

This was such a minor procedure. Whenever we do things like this my thoughts go out to all the parents who have to watch their children endure such difficult, painful medical procedures. It makes me feel both nervous and grateful.

So we're home, eating scrambled eggs and prepping for a long day of Dora and playing in the basement playroom. Should be fun.

Thanks for all the support.

Following Directions and Making Observations

This weekend Ellie was whining and stumbling around the kitchen. I guessed that she was hungry. I said, Ellie do you want to eat? Go get your highchair. A few beats later, she returned from the den (next to the kitchen, where we keep the high chair) pushing her high chair.

She also brought me her coat when I told her it was time to go bye-bye.

And when I asked her for Leo's Pull-up, she brought it to me.

She is only allowed her paci when in her crib. Overnight it usually pops out of her mouth and lands on the floor under her crib. Every night before bed she runs into her room and crouches down to search for a escaped paci. She remembers exactly where it will be.

In the car she had a bag of Veggy Booty. I asked her to give Leo some and she did.
I'm amazed by how much she understands and remembers.

This morning Leo was eating his oatmeal and spotted my umbrella sitting next to my purse on the kitchen table. Our conversation went like this:

Leo: "Whassat?" he asked (his favorite question of late), pointing to the umbrella.

"That's an umbrella," I answered.

A few beats later:

Leo: "Rain."

I love watching Leo's mind work.

Out of Touch

I haven’t been writing much lately and I don’t know why. Actually I think I do know why. There just seems to be so much going on that I can’t find a single thread to boil down into a post. I know that shouldn’t stop me. I should just write lots of small entries. I don’t know, I just feel overwhelmed and when I feel that way I don’t write and then it just snowballs into silence.

So, a few updates.

-After a lot of hand wringing and analysis, we’ve decided to go ahead with the sedated ear procedure tomorrow. I sincerely appreciate all the comments in response to my question. I’m beyond nervous about it (think of us tomorrow at 6:45 a.m. EST if you’re up) but the pre-op nurse assured me it would be a quick procedure. It’s just been a while since we’ve had to do anything like this and it’s just, well, it’s always hard. Leo’s been having ear issues since he was tiny and he’s become downright traumatized when it comes to anyone touching his ears. As much as I am not a fan of general anesthesia it would be nice to not do anything to contribute to his terror of All Things Ear. Also, he squirms and carries on so much during ear exams that it’s not out of the question that some actual damage could be done. And, how great would it be if, while under anesthesia the doctor could really get in there and clean and get rid of the fluid and do whatever it takes to help our guy hear better? Come on, language!

-Leo’s parent-teacher conference was last Wednesday. It went well. He is meeting and exceeding all of his goals and he is on track to “graduate” to the next grade (primary) in the fall. He’ll go from being with three and four year olds to a class of kids that ranges from five to nine! That should be a pretty big change for him. We also discussed our goal (mine and Erin’s) of having Leo begin kindergarten at age six in district, most likely with a one-to-one aide. No one looked at me like I had three heads when I brought it up so hopefully it’s an actual possibility for the 2010-2011 school year.

Leo’s teacher described him as being like a “sponge,” that he loves to learn and that she has had to be quite creative with his goals because he is mastering them so quickly. So I can’t complain about that. I even wondered if maybe he might be getting a little bored in this class? But he’s not ready to move up yet (he actually can’t since he’s not five) so we’ll just hope that he can continue to get what he can out of this class and really master the skills he needs to move up. We also talked about Leo’s behavior (he is mostly very well behaved at school and has only recently started exhibiting some problems with transitions, throwing tantrums when he doesn’t want to do something) and we all agreed that it is directly related to his frustration with language. Since that continues to be his greatest delay, I asked for and got an additional private speech session. Who knows if throwing more therapy his way will help, but I’m pretty sure it won’t hurt. And it’s somehow satisfying to get additional services.

-I haven’t talked about potty training for a while because A) I know that it’s pretty boring to anyone but the parent doing the potty training and B) I didn’t want to jinx it. Let’s just say that Leo is consistently performing. He still does not tell us when he has to go but apparently that is a long way off. So for now the onus is on us to get off our butts and take him every two hours like we’re supposed to. Easier said than done! Never thought I’d say it but diapers are almost easier.

-The attacks against Ellie seem to have mellowed slightly. This may be in part because Ellie has developed a high pitched shriek that I liken to something you might see on a National Geographic special, when a smaller animal is at risk of being attacked by a larger one that smaller one might emit this decibel to frighten the attacker away. Mostly, Leo laughs when Ellie does this. But it also stops him directly in his tracks. Of course there was this morning when a sweet pat turned into a hug which then turned into a full on, push Ellie backwards so that she lands on her head. Oh well. Baby steps.

-This might be the most boring post ever, but I feel at least slightly up to date now.

Ear Question

Does anyone out there have any experience with needing to sedate their kid to clean out their ears?

Long story short, Leo had an ear infection a few weeks ago. His ped pronounced one of his tubes had "fallen out" and to follow up with the ENT in a few weeks. We went yesterday and the ENT said that Leo's ear was too filled with wax for him to be able to see anything (I know, ick!) and that the only way to clean it properly would be to sedate him (no I.V. or intubation, just some gas and it would take five minutes). He said if the tube was out, he'd clean out the ears, suck up the fluid and maybe put it another set of tubes.

This just sounds, I don't know...extreme. For waxy ears? Sedation? I spoke to Leo's old ENT today and he said maybe once he's had to sedate an older, uncooperative child who he could not restrain. But that he would never sedate Leo. But, he also said that he would recommend getting those tubes taken out anyway, since he doesn't like them to be in longer than two years (and we're approaching the two-year mark).

Trouble is, this doctor is in Manhattan, not so far geographically but such a headache to get Leo into, on a weekday (traffic, traffic, $ to park and oh did I mention traffic?). Not that I would let a little traffic and $ stand in the way of my kid receiving the best medical care, but I'm just wondering if it's worth the hassle.

And...I have to say that the time Leo was restrained (not sedated) in order to get a tube removed by this previous doctor (which I think is similar in trauma speak for a four-year-old), that probably took a few years off my life (Leo screamed so loud and hard that he split his lip in two places. Yes there was blood, he cried so hard). Which is making me think, maybe sedation isn't so bad?

But I'm open to opinions. I know there are some ENT veteran mommies out there. Please, speak up! What would you do?

Weekend Warrior

I’d like to say that I use the above term to describe how Leo has taken up mountain biking, rock climbing and other various adventurey type sports. But no. Leo has taken to beating up on his sister.

To be fair, I know this is normal (well, I’m told this is normal by Erin, who is an experienced older sibling). We’re not in seriously fear-for-her-life territory, it’s just constant pushing and shoving mostly. But it’s relentless. Ellie is fairly steady on her feet but one good push and down she goes. And thus begins the Ellie wailing. And boy can she lay it on thick. And did I mention the other fun activity? Pushing her down and the holding her down. What fun! I do have to wonder what it would be like to be her. To have someone constantly looking to do you harm. How must that feel? Then again, how must it feel to be Leo, to constantly have to share the limelight. I don’t think he remembers being an only child, but maybe he does? I hope that I am seriously over thinking this.

I find myself even more exhausted by the hooligans lately, with this new, violent phase. I know it’s an attention thing on Leo’s part, because he is a completely different kid when by himself (that is, when he’s one-on-one with either Erin or me). I am running out of ideas. The time-outs don’t work. The pattern is send him to time-out, “Leo say you’re sorry.” Then, two minutes later, shove Ellie, toddler tears ensue. Wash, rinse, repeat.

To be fair, he does have transient moments of sweetness. He still brings her a toy while she wails through diaper changes, just like he did when she was a newborn. He pats her on the back when she cries (ironically oftentimes the reason she is crying to begin with is because HE pushed her).

I leave you with a shot of Ellie at the mall play area (I know, ick, but it was cold and wet and I was desperate), taken on Sunday. I'll write more about that experience later. Leo refused pictures, using his best "no!" Exorcist-like voice (another fun new development!).

Mommy, Turkey socks, et all

It’s a bullet kind of day. Honestly, it’s been a bullet kind of week.

So, a few things:

-Ellie said “Mommy” to me this morning. She’s said “Mama” but that’s Erin’s name. I’m Mommy (dammit!). Leo has still never said it (he actually calls me “dee-dee,” don’t ask). But this morning, when I went into Ellie’s room to get her up for the day, she started chanting “Mommy, Mommy.” Very exciting!

-Poor Ellie has been exhausted the last few evenings, like so tired I think she could go straight to bed after dinner tired. Unfortunately due to work schedules/logistics, that’s not possible. It just really sucks that the only Ellie-time I get during the week is cranky Ellie time, in which she spends most of her time running over to me and throwing herself into my arms/the back of my legs, depending on whether I’m sitting or standing. She just collapses into a puddle of sad, exhausted, whiney toddler tears. Pathetic. I’ve asked them to try to put her down for an afternoon nap at daycare. Hopefully that will help.

-Leo’s almost done with the antibiotics for his ear infection but he is still complaining about the “bee” in his ear. And he has started SCREAMING, as in talking VERY LOUD. I know little boys are loud but this is ridiculous. So I think we’re dealing with some fluid issues. As I said, his ped pronounced one of his tubes “falling out so it’s not doing it’s job.” Great. We’re going to the ENT this coming Wednesday. I moved the appointment up.

-I am using all the strength I can muster to not spend $40 on socks and tights. I have a 20 percent off coupon for a great sock and tight website (I know, who knew?). I am doing what I usually do when I want to shop but not spend money, which is put all the stuff I want in my “basket” and then look at it throughout the day. Usually by the end of the day I don’t care so much. But socks are so fun! They always fit! And they are cheaper than shoes. And don’t even get me started on how much I love knee highs. I mean, really, aren’t these cute (minus the slutty mini-skirt of course)



And I know they're a little corny, but how adorable are these?
You may as well know I am a sucker for holiday themed socks. Yes I wore pumpkin socks leading up to and on Halloween and I'll wear Santa/reindeer/holly socks leading up to and on Christmas. Now i just need the turkeys to complete the trinity of late-year holidays...

-I am not enjoying the time change. It is dark as night when I leave my office. OK it is night. It was fine when I was on maternity leave/cozy at home. But commuting in the dark? Not so fun.

Doh'

I pulled out the Play-Doh last weekend. Ellie's first time. I wasn't sure she'd know not to eat it.


She only ate a little.


I think she wondered what the heck it was.


Leo, meanwhile, very much enjoyed himself. He was concentrating so hard on his little penguin that he looks a little like Frankenstein here. And I'm still not sure about his haircut. He looks a little Nazi-Youth to me. I ask, once again, where did these blonde children come from? And also, I just found out that people with Down syndrome never have curly hair? This is so strange to me. So, so strange. I realize this has nothing to do with Play Doh.

Baking with Leo

Leo and I made cranberry pumpkin bread on Sunday while Ellie napped. It was a lot of fun and I was so impressed by his attention span. He really wanted to be involved and stuck through the whole process. He loved counting cups and spoonfuls and pouring the ingredients in the big bowl.

The apron he's wearing belonged to my mom. I didn't plan it, I just grabbed it from the pantry closet and thought it was the perfect size for him (the only other apron I have is big so I wore that one). I thought it was sweet that he wore her apron. And he was almost as excited about that apron as he was about the helping make the bread. He insisted on wearing it for most of the afternoon.