Resolutions

I'm not big on New Year's Resolutions. I think I last made them sometime in high school. Lose thirty pounds. Run five times a week. Let's just say those didn't stick.

The sentiment of a fresh start is nice though. And who isn't a proponent of self-improvement?

Something Cate posted a few weeks ago has resonated for me since I read it (that's a good thing). I can't think of better resolutions than the ones she shared. By the way this is sometimes attributed to Mother Theresa but apparently it's debatable. The Roches also do a wonderful musical of rendition of this too.

People are often unreasonable, illogical,
and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, People may accuse you
of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some
false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank,
people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone
could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness,
they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today,
people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have,
and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis,
it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

This is another one of those passages I would just like to tattoo on my arm so I don't forget it. I just want to live it. This year, I'm really going to try.


It's been quite a memorable final week of 2010 for us, what with that little snow storm. I have a feeling 2011 is going to be quite remarkable too.

From our house to yours, a very, very Happy New Year!

Early Gifts

I arrived at the holiday lunch yesterday at Leo’s school (the flyer instructed us all to “dress to impress”) surprised to see Leo, walking the buffet line, holding his little tray, all by himself.

This photo is a bit Where’s Waldo? (and apologies for the horrific composition and that woman's GIANT hand) but I promise you that Leo is there. He is earnestly surveying the spread (upholding the family names, this boy is serious about his food).

He went on to have two helpings of stuffed shells, and kept one hand on my leg for most of the hour (except for when I took this picture, of course).

It was such a nice time. These little moments alone with my boy just mean so much. And spending time with him at school is even more special. He’s so appreciative and excited did I mention, grown up? I just love little glimpses of him in his “other life.” He’s come so far this year. The sentences, the reading, (I made the mistake of leaving a Toys R Us bag out in full view and note to self: can’t do that anymore because oops! My kid can read!). To say nothing of how much he's matured in his behavior, following directions and listening and acting less impulsively.

Leo kept offering me some of his food though I politely declined. Every few minutes he would look around at his friends and teacher and aides and say, “Mommy’s here!” We sat by good buddy Terry (Leo talks about him often) and Terry kept leaning over to me and saying “Leo’s mom!” as if he too, couldn’t quite believe I was there.

Unfortunately I missed the school holiday sing-a-long this morning. But I got a little preview last night on the drive home from aftercare, when Leo busted out with “Feliz Navidad,” singing along with the radio. He knows all the words (this was news to me).

Merry Christmas, indeed.

Santa Love

Going in for the hug. My, we've come a long way.

At long last!

Check out Leo's little hand on Santa's knee. He did not want to get off that lap.

Humpty, The Corrections and a Monday List

Well here we are again. Another week down.

Things continue to be busy and exhausting, but good.

-Leo has moved on from “Hey Diddle Diddle” to “Humpty Dumpty.” When he says the latter, it comes out sounding something like Duddy Duddy. Ask me how long it took me to figure that one out. I had a realization the other day though. Leo continues to have the patience of a saint with me when I can’t understand him. And when I do finally “get it?” It’s like Christmas and a birthday and kittens and puppies all at once. It’s just the best feeling ever, for him and for me. It’s like every little accomplishment or milestone when it comes to Leo: they are celebrations and never taken for granted.

-Ellie had her winter concert last week. It was as adorable as expected and no surprise, required tissues (for me, not her). The little class of three year olds marched in all wearing matching Santa hats. Ellie wore her exquisite red velvet dress with the faux white fur color that looks straight out of “White Christmas,” courtesy of Grandma Jerry (seriously, I wish I could find one in my size). A few kids broke from the line to hug parents in the audience but Ellie remained stoic, opting instead, to exclaim “Miss Jamie! [her teacher] My mommy is here!”

-I’ve decided that living with a three year old is an exercise in constantly being told you are wrong. Because according to Ellie, it’s not tuna, it’s tuna fish. The stuffed animal I gave her after she asked for him at bedtime the other night, he’s a bear, not a lamb [she was right, I confess]. And don't forget to use an absolutely exasperated tone that sounds more like thirteen year old than three year old. Thankfully, Ellie still tells me that she is “tendering” to do something. I still vow to never correct her and tell her it’s “pretending.” And I might cry when she stops saying “tendering” because I find it so adorable.

-On a positive note, Ellie is suddenly Little Miss Compliment. She likes my hair (when worn down). She likes my scarf and my glasses and my new boots. She likes Erin’s headband and Miss Jamie’s sequined skirt. It makes me smile.

-Leo had a note in his backpack about a new program at school wherein “Finn” the dog (a Labrador) will visit various classes and the children will practice reading to him. I love this idea and can’t wait to hear how it turns out. I promise to report back.

-I am still in denial about all the holiday baking I have to do. This weekend is going to have to be IT. Where are my elves when I need them?

More More More

Yesterday we made a gingerbread house. From the second I came in the door Saturday afternoon with the box (a kit from Trader Joe’s—two thumbs way up, by the way), Leo and Ellie were both crazed about when we were going to make it.

This was the first year the two of them did it together. I realized we skipped it last year (not sure why) and the year before Ellie was napping (I know this from the pictures because she was noticeably absent). I went back and forth about getting two houses, worried there would be some construction/candy placement bickering but decided to just get one and lo and behold it was the first of many Christmas miracles, Leo and Ellie were both little angels throughout the whole process. Amazing what a little (OK a lot) of candy can do for a mood on a Sunday morning, isn’t it?

Well, they were mostly angels.

While Ellie was bent on snacking, Leo was more interested in helping organize the candy. And when I say organize, I mean spill candy corn everywhere. Ah my boy adores good old cause and effect. His little “accidents” are always followed by profuse apologies though so I can never really get mad.

And believe it or not, I remained calm even without Bailey’s in my coffee. With holiday music playing on the iPod, the Christmas tree lights twinkling in the background and the sun streaming in the kitchen window and these two little scrumptious people, how could I be anything but happy? Even if half the candy was at some point, on the floor.

Ellie is a Candy Fiend, as I’m sure most three year olds are. Leo, meanwhile, is probably the only child I have ever met who, while making a house comprised of candy, asks for grapes. I’m not kidding.

I don’t think Ellie could quite believe it when, every time she asked if she could try a gummie bear or an M&M, I answered “Sure!” and “Why not?” and “Go for it!” At one point she had two small lollipops AND a piece of gum in her mouth at the same time. I mean really, how many times a year do we build gingerbread houses? And yes, I even gave her her own bowl of candy corn. She was, well, it was pure bliss. By the end of it I swear she had sugar in her eyelashes.

I read on this site a recommendation to use up old Halloween candy on gingerbread houses, which was genius, I thought. The kit I bought came with candy but not nearly enough. I’m of the belief that when it comes to gingerbread houses, more is definitely more. That site also used a cupcake pan to hold the candy which also worked out great (kept candy close together, minimized spillage (ahem) and I didn’t have to wash or use fourteen tiny bowls).


And now, our pretty little house is living on our kitchen table for all to admire.

If I could only figure out how to keep Ellie from eating it.

I mean just look at her, plotting her next move.
Oh well. Maybe I'll just pretend not to notice.

Leo Can Have the Duplos. I'll Take the Caviar.

Happy Hanukkah!

(Photo from a past Hanukkah. Last night was not the sixth night).

This seems to be the first year that anyone is very interested in lighting the menorah. Ellie rushes to get the candles every night and asks me how many we need. Leo refuses to assist in the lighting, preferring to keep his distance from the flame I guess, but he sings the blessing along with me. Ellie is fascinated by lighting the candles and wraps her little hand around mine as we light each one together.

Of course, I’m sure the presents aren’t hurting in piqueing their interest in the Not As Glamorous As Christmas Holiday. Growing up, I did not come from one of those “a present every night for eights days” families. I scoffed at those spoiled ones (hmm…jealous much?) but now that I’m a parent? Well? I have to admit. Giving little presents every night is more than a little fun.

Yesterday I spent way too much time on the gathering of the little gifts. A trip to the Lego store in Rockefeller Center was amazing. Crowded, but amazing. I settled on this (a Duplo Hayride!) and Leo was in love. He didn’t want to go to bed because he wanted to play with it. Then when he finally came upstairs (with the truck of course), he wanted to take a bath because he wanted to bring the hayride into the bath.

And so I think it’s safe to say that this holiday season for Leo will be recalled as the year of the Lego. We went with Duplos because I think they’ll be easier for Leo. I hope I’m right. I played around with some of the “bigger kid” Legos at the store yesterday and they are tiny and even I had a hard time fitting some of them together and especially taking them apart. I’m stifling the urge to go back to the Lego store on my lunch break today for another little set like the one I gave him last night. It’s all leading up to the piece de resistance, which is this, to be given on Christmas morning.

This weekend I’m thinking about latkes. The latkes (and other recipes) featured here look amazing (creme fraiche and caviar? Yes please!). But I’ve never made latkes that actually tasted good and did anything more than make the house smell like onions and potatoes for a week. Maybe because I forgot the caviar? So maybe we’ll go with takeout. I am a sucker for sour cream and apple sauce though.

Oh and also? The whole If you don’t get dressed/come upstairs/put your coat on/fill-in-the-blank, Santa is not coming and no more Hanukkah presents…Totally, totally works. It’s like, MAGIC.

What am I going to do on December 26 when they stop listening to me again?

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Oh I want to stop time right now. I love love love the stretch of days between Thanksgiving all the way through New Year’s. It means warm houses and cooking and baking and choral music and decorations and time off work and time home with the kids and visiting family. I’m in a bit of denial about all the gifts that need purchasing and goodies that need to made, wrapped and distributed to various teachers, therapists and caregivers. It's making me feel a little itchy, to be honest. Oh heck, it will be fun, right? And it will all get done because it always does.

Here are a few other tidbits, since I seem incapable of a coherent post.

-All this “home time” the last four days reminded me how the kids have been playing soooo well together lately, I’m almost afraid to talk about it. They come up with elaborate schemes, such as outdoor tea parties which translate to: put all the outdoor chairs around the mini trampoline, sit in the chairs, and pretend to eat and drink. There is also train assembling (lining up various furniture to make “trains”) and of course, good old stand-bys, like “making a bed” (see above). To say nothing of “doctor,” and “school.”

-Most of these ideas are orchestrated by Ellie (who is quite the boss) but Leo is an eager participant. There is less bickering now that Ellie can call Leo on his antics (I don’t love the tattle tale trait but it’s mighty convenient when I’m upstairs and they are in the basement playroom and Leo is doing something like, oh I don’t know, stacking a stool on top of a table so that he can reach a shelf). NOT COOL and he knows it but this doesn’t stop him from trying to get away with it.

-Leo is talking a lot. While he continues to be difficult to understand at times, he has a couple of new phrases that come out clear as a bell:
“I got it.”
“No thank you.”
“Here you go.”
"I don't know."

-Ellie no longer seems to enjoy being my translator. If I ask her what Leo is saying she almost always responds “I dunno” whereas two months ago she always knew just what he was saying. However when they are playing and I hear them talking to each other and I have no earthly idea what Leo is saying, Ellie always does. So I think she’s just holding out on me. Oh well. As long as they understand each other.

-We got our Christmas tree on Saturday. I told you we like to drink up this season for all it's worth. I almost think we don't need to bother with presents for Leo this year because he was positively enthralled with all the decorations. I'm kidding of course about the presents but he had a blast with it all. The little figurines and miniature Christmas themed stuffed animals and music boxes collected over the years and dreidels make for some good, good times. Who knew? He assembled all the "guys" so that it looked like there was this giant holiday caucus between a porcelain Santa and about twenty various Rudolphs, snowmen, ceramic houses and trains. Then, as we were decorating the tree Ellie announced: "This is going to be the best Christmas ever!" Minutes later came the melodramatic proclamation that "Christmas was ruined!" I have no idea where she gets this kind of talk.

-You can call me cheesy (it wouldn't be the first time) but I cannot stop listening to “Just the Way You Are” from last week’s “Glee.” I would watch that wedding reception scene too, non-stop too if anyone in the house let me view anything but Nick Jr., but that’s another story. (Scroll down to the second video clip on this page to see it).

That song. That scene. It was just…life affirming. And inspiring and could apply to so many realms of life: Down syndrome, being a gay teenager, being gay period, not feeling like you fit in or belong or matter, no matter what it is that makes you "different." Well you do. You’re amazing. Just the way you are.